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Number of Intimate Partners?

Since this is a great way to be anonymous and divulge secrets... I am researching intimate relationships for one of my college classes and I just kind of wanted to get a grasp on how much variation there is on the number of sexual partners people have depending on their age and gender. (though it might be good to note if you are married now.. etc)

I won't use this information in any way since it is not an accurate way to collect data but for curiosity's sake.. post away. =)

Sat. Jan 5, 4:23pm

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I'm 17, female, unmarried/not in a relationship and have had 0 partners.

This thread might also help, if you read through them all and pick out the info.


Saturday, January 05, 2008, 4:31 PM

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0 intimate partners

Saturday, January 05, 2008, 4:34 PM

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21/Female/0 partners

Saturday, January 05, 2008, 4:53 PM

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Interesting that everyone that has responded have not had any "intimate partners".

Interestingly, I have never kept track of how many men I have "hooked up" with - meaning sexual activity that doesn't involve intercourse (oral and manual). It took me a bit to count them up! I'm glad this is anonymous, though I don't think I'm particularly unique among college women.

20 year old single Female
Intimate partners: 10 (includes partners I had sex with and partners I just hooked up with)
Sexual intercourse partners: 3

Saturday, January 05, 2008, 5:30 PM

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19 year old female
Sexual partners: 7

4 of them were one-night stands... 1 was a short summer romance.. and 2 were in commited relationships...

I'm not exactly proud... I trusted and loved others too easily so when I think I might end up being in a relationship with someone... it turns out he only wanted a night of sex and nothing more.

I respect virgins so very much for waiting till marriage or a meaningful relationiship.. regretting the past is a terrible thing.

Hopefully a day will come when I am wanted for more then a night in bed. =/

Saturday, January 05, 2008, 5:47 PM

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1 intimate partner - my husband

Saturday, January 05, 2008, 6:14 PM

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Negative Topic For Sure

Who cares! We are trying to get encouragement about staying healthy and fit. How does your conversation play into getting healthy versus looking at sexually deviant behavior patterns.

Saturday, January 05, 2008, 6:28 PM

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not too many

I'm female, engaged and have had three partners.

Saturday, January 05, 2008, 6:33 PM

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Female, 32
Sexual intercourse - 2; Don't regret either. I needed a good shag. Virgin till I was 29.
Oral/Other - over 30, Maybe 40...Good times. Good times.
Never been in a relationship.

Saturday, January 05, 2008, 6:36 PM

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6. And I've enjoyed the heck out of every one of them. :-D

Saturday, January 05, 2008, 7:03 PM

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4:53 here

6:56-- I think it depends on the person. Yes, there are some people who live "loose" sexual lives, but others who do not. I plan to remain a virgin until marriage. I'm 21 right now and don't intend to get married any time soon. Maybe 10 years from now if it's right. Otherwise, I want to wait for the right person...not rush due to societal pressure. Where do you live?

Saturday, January 05, 2008, 7:07 PM

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43 years old
married 16 years
oral or manual=6
oh i think i should also mention i've "messed around" with 4 women!!!
each and every experience a BLAST! : )

Saturday, January 05, 2008, 7:14 PM

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45, 20 or so, one night stands
4 serious relationships
now married for 15 years

Saturday, January 05, 2008, 8:50 PM

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50 yrs old, 9 partners.

I wonder if older women (generally) have had more partners not because there have been more years to be active but because the culture has changed. When I was growing up there was not the "pressure" to be a virgin like you see among some younger people now. I have 2 nieces who have taken vows to remain virgins until they marry. I'm not putting a value judgement on it, I just wonder if it is a sign of the times.

Saturday, January 05, 2008, 9:06 PM

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Wow I feel like the slut of the bunch. I am assuming intimate can even mean one night stands? If so then I've been intimate with maybe 100-125 men, I'm 39. And yes a lot of it was in my young, dumb and wild days. I've been with only 6 men in the last 15 years and my husband was the last 7 of those.

Saturday, January 05, 2008, 10:28 PM

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I am very proud to state that I was a virgin also till 29 years of age...My wedding nightwas when I gave myself completly to my husband he is the only man I have ever or will ever be with...I am so blessed to have waited!

Saturday, January 05, 2008, 10:42 PM

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25/married/intimate including everything then I've had 60-70 intimate partners

Saturday, January 05, 2008, 11:06 PM

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fellow slut of the bunch ....

Hey there .. I am 35 and I have had sex with 38 guys over the years. I started young and had a lot of "fun" in college. Even though the number is high I am disease free and can't really say that I regret anything.

I am currently married and my husband loves me, past and all. We have always been open and honest with each other and we talked about it before we got together. He on the other hand has had sex with 6 women. Great sex with each other for over 4 years =)

Saturday, January 05, 2008, 11:28 PM

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I'm one of the 21 year old virgins here, but I'm curious...and this may show how innocent and naive I am, although I don't like using that term to describe myself, how is sex initiated aside from being in a relationship? I mean how do you just meet men and decide to engage?

Saturday, January 05, 2008, 11:53 PM

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11:53 - I often wonder the same thing and I'm 39 years old! I often joke with my husband that, if I were so inclined - and single, I wouldn't know the first thing about picking up a man for a one night stand. He tells me it wouldn't be difficult. Apparently, if you're willing you can find a guy who will oblige! I assume this is in a setting where alcohol is involved, but again - I have no idea :)

Me - 18 years, same guy. Before that - intercourse with 3, harmless hookups - no oral - just kissing and touching - probably 45. I actually made a list in my journal when I was dating my husband and wrote it as a letter to a future daughter. Now I have that daughter and there's no way in hell she's ever seeing that list. At least not until she's out of college or married!

Sunday, January 06, 2008, 12:03 AM

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11:53 here

12:03-- so how were you able to hook up with 45 men then? How does it just happen?

I guess since I've never had a BF before so I don't know lol!

Sunday, January 06, 2008, 12:20 AM

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10 people

Sunday, January 06, 2008, 12:22 AM

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Another slut in the group!

32, and I would say about 120 men, and 5 women. Oddly enough, I planned to stay a virgin until I got married. I got engaged, he talked me into having sex with him, and after we broke up (I was 19) - I went on a rampage through college. Not as many now, but still 4-5 a year. I have a "2 month relationship" problem. I get sick of them after a couple months.

Sunday, January 06, 2008, 12:25 AM

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29 yr old virgin here - great discussion here...i had no intensions of being a virgin that long. i was just really overweight and insecure. i didn't get sexually active till i started losing the weight - around 25. i was about 175 pounds then. i kept losing and the guys kept coming. that was why i didn't have sex with any of them. they were to easy. plus, i find safe-sex much more entertaining and interesting.

to the poster asking how it is done...eye contact. it is that easy. when you see it, you see it. when you don't, you don't.

Sunday, January 06, 2008, 1:07 AM

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25 years old
6 intercourse partners (1 one night stand, 3 friends with benefits, 2 relationships)
5 other hook-ups

Sunday, January 06, 2008, 1:07 AM

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Funny it didn't even cross my mind to list the women. So I'm 38, married now for 7 years but I've had about 120-130 men and 4 women. Sound bad, but I honestly don't regret any of it. I to am disease free, thankfully!

Sunday, January 06, 2008, 1:46 AM

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4 intercourse partners (three long term relationships, one short relationship)

Sunday, January 06, 2008, 4:09 AM

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35 - married for 6 years...

Intercourse with 7 (3 serious relationships, 1 one night stand, 3 casual-relationships), oral - don't know, but not many more. Don't regret a single encounter, but although I'm fortunate to have not contracted anything from any of my partners - I wish i'd been more insistent on safe sex every time.

However I dated ~300 guys before I settled down with my husband. Yes - eye contact - it's that easy. I could have had a different partner every night if I'd so chosen. I though about waiting for marriage, but I'm rather glad I didn't. I had some d@rn good sex and each partner was a valuable learning experience :-). I was so much more comfortable with sex, myself and what I did and didn't like when I met my now-husband.

Sunday, January 06, 2008, 4:58 AM

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40 and married.

One intercourse partner, my husband.

Sunday, January 06, 2008, 9:31 AM

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How does it happen? Eye contact is right! Now that I"m married, I don't look men in the eyes unless their significant others are around!

I couldn't keep men away until I figured this thing out. They see your eyes as an invitation. So, if you want more men, look the ones you want directly in the eyes and smile (then look away, then look back)...It's like a mating call! Confidence and style are also great turn-ons for men.

Good luck, PP!

Sunday, January 06, 2008, 9:32 AM

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12:20am - how did I hook up with 45 guys - and by hook up I mean that I only kissed them ...some of them were boyfriends, but many were friends that I ended up kissing - and that usually involved alcohol. There were a few spring break guys - but again, only kissing! I don't know - our high school was tight - all grades - so we hung out with a lot of the same people for years and years. Maybe that made a difference?

Sunday, January 06, 2008, 9:51 AM

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12:20 here
Yeah I guess since I don't drink/party, the type of people I hang out with, my upbringing, my beliefs, and the fact that I live at home for college/go to a commuter school, makes a big difference as to why I haven't had these experiences.

I can only picture myself kissing no more than 5 men up until I get married. And I expect all of them to be in relationships with me.

I know maybe I seem prude, but I'm a very liberal person. However, when it comes to sex, I'm conservative.

Sunday, January 06, 2008, 2:11 PM

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2 intimate partners

Always wondered if there really are women out there like on Sex and the City drifting from one guy to the next.

Sunday, January 06, 2008, 2:18 PM

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Until I met my current partner of five years (we're getting married in less than two months, and currently have sex... once a week or in two weeks?.. pathetic.. grown up, overworked and overstressed), so until I met him, when I was 23, about 30. all good time.

Sunday, January 06, 2008, 2:54 PM

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26 years old. Intercourse with 10 different guys. Kissed less than 20. Had oral with 4 guys I didn't wind up having intercourse with. That's the extent of it.
5 were boyfriends, 3 were boy toys (ongoing exclusive sexual relationship, but with someone I would never date/intro to parents) 2 were one night stands.

Currently single.

Sunday, January 06, 2008, 4:12 PM

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26, just out of a long term relationship. total partners 50 or so. :) I was a fun girl in college. Have only had sex with one person in the last 3 years. He's gone now... thinking I might be open for business again ;)

disease free and always have been.

Sunday, January 06, 2008, 9:17 PM

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1 answer, 17 year old here. Really wondering, how have a lot of you been able to stay safe, unpreggie and disease free? That's a major fear for me and a reason I haven't put myself out there yet. Just wondering =] Thanks!

Sunday, January 06, 2008, 10:33 PM

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Yeah I'm the 21 year old who was wondering how one is able to get involved with so many men. I still don't see how eye contact can do it for you lol.

Well anyway, I'm in agreement with you too, 17 year old. And that's a big reason why I don't intend to engage until marriage with hopefully someone *cross my fingers* who is a virgin as well...all those diseases. Also HPV...which could lead to cervical cancer..even head and neck cancers! You may have herpes or hpv or whatever and not even show symptoms. That's so scary.

Sunday, January 06, 2008, 10:41 PM

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me again ...

I originally commented Jan 5 11:28 - I have been reading the rest of the posts and am loving the open honest discussion!

It is all about personal choice ladies ... what feels right at the time and what doesn't you know? Of the 38 men I have been with , shockingly none of them were one night stands. Each one I dated for a period of time and decided to "go there" so to speak. I dated a lot the end of high school and a whole lot in college.

To the lady who asked about Sex and The City - it is true and I absolutely love the honesty of that show!!! There are career women out there who are confident in themselves and can enjoy sex and dating. Like the Carrie character once stated, if you are a single woman in your 30's it is inevitable that you rack up a few numbers =)

For the ladies asking about diseases. You have to be educated, tested and careful. Condoms are wonderful things and every single woman who is "active" should have her own with her at all times. Don't ever depend on a man to provide - it is your body and your responsibility. And remember, you can catch almost every disease with just kissing or oral sex. All it takes is an open cut in your mouth or his.

Enjoy yourself ladies and be careful and smart. You will all do what is right for you!

Sunday, January 06, 2008, 11:43 PM

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28 F married
One and only one -my husband

Monday, January 07, 2008, 6:50 PM

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I'm 16 and I've had 5 intimate partners.
3 were boyfriends that took advantage of me and two were friends with benefits.

Tuesday, August 07, 2012, 3:44 PM

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I'm glad I'm not the only one. Being taken advantage of sucks but I promised myself last week that I wouldn't have sex again until I was married or in a meaningful relationship and I let it happen last night and this morning with my bestfriend, yes friends with benefits ._. I don't know, it's hard. I'm 16 and I'm at 5.. It's like ergggghhh, not so proud.

Tuesday, August 07, 2012, 5:01 PM

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I'm 40 and I've had over 25 partners. It seems like a lot but I never thought I was really out there that much!

Monday, August 13, 2012, 12:40 PM

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56, female
3 sexual partners
all were monogomous relationships while they lasted
1st lasted 16 years; he died
2nd lasted 4 years; he was a childish ass and wouldn't grow up so I dumped him
3rd lasted 12 years; alas, he also died

no more relationships for me

Monday, August 20, 2012, 1:37 PM

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sexual amnesia

43 years old

How can you keep track after you hit 25-30? I stopped keeping track back in college. Awkward when I run into the ones I don't remember until they mention it! I hate that look they give me because I don't instantly recognize or remember them. And they were 20 years ago! Slight regret....

I've been married for almost 15 years. I'm definitely with my last!

Tuesday, August 21, 2012, 12:15 AM

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31 yo, 17. How do I keep track? I actually keep a list in my blackberry... I regret one or two- none were under the influence, but one or two were definitely pity sex, and I regret those. Having no sex, is better than bad sex, blech.

Not getting prego is easy when you have a clockwork schedule. Caught something once when someone cheated.

Sex is fun. I don't buy into it being only something magical to be shared between two people in love. Sure- it's usually best when you're with someone you love, but it can still be a great time with someone you simply lust after.

Tuesday, August 21, 2012, 7:30 PM

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