Are you positive or negative? Be honest!

I have been a negative person for most of my life and I finally can admit it. I only realized this recently. My husband has been telling me this for years but I always disagreed. I am very happy with my life, my family, my weight loss, etc. But I cant seem to shake my first reaction to things which is, NO THAT WONT WORK!

Now I see my evil ways and I want to change. I recently attended one of those SELF HELP MOTIVATIONAL seminars and that is helping me but I a still feeling a bit stuck.

Any advice?

Tue. Nov 13, 12:33am

I stopped being so negative when I went to college for engineering. There is great emphasis placed on ataining the ability to break any problem into small, solvable pieces and to solve them in such a way that previously solved portions give the answer to the portions you haven't answered yet. So you have to look at the problem as a whole, identify the pieces (and how they relate to each other) and attack them in best order you can determine.

This has really changed the way i live my life. I've become much more positive because now when I look at a problem - I think in terms of solutions. Even if I can't solve the whole problem, at least I can solve some of it and maybe more solutions will come to me while I do. This helps keep me from feeling hopeless/helpless. I think many folks look at a problem, only see what they can't do, and feel overwhelmed by the enormity of it. One bite at a time :-)

Tuesday, November 13, 2007, 9:57 AM

I have always considered myself a positive person. I am always looking at the brighter side of the situation. I thank my father for that. Instead of having a hardship and dwelling on feeling sorry for myself, I immediately start solving the problem.

Recently, my father's best friend died. He was torn apart, of course. I was and am very sad about the situation. But I took the death of my father's friend as a reminder that we never know how long we have in this world. It's made me want to spend more time and make more memories with my family and friends-and I have. It has also brought me and my father closer together. I have also started noticing the little things a bit more. Taking time to smell the roses, if you will.

To sum it up, OP, I really see my life as one learning experience after the next and realize that the only thing that's real is love...and everything else falls to the wayside.

AND-
If your first instinct is to say something negative, stop, and say three positve things instead. It will become a habit.

Tuesday, November 13, 2007, 10:13 AM

I am a pretty negative person... have been all my life. I went through a stage where I THOUGHT I was a positive person, but I still saw the world in the same negative manner.

Tuesday, November 13, 2007, 10:51 AM

You just have to appreciate how lucky you are. How much more you have in your life than alot of other people. We are very lucky to live in the US. We have so many opportunities! Do you or your husband have a car, house, job, kids? You are alos lucky to have those. So many people do not.
My boss said to me that he was unlucky because his Mom was sick, he had a car accident & his son was sick. I told him he WAS LUCKY because he wasnt killed, they saved his Moms life & they are fixing up his son. What more can he ask for?

Tuesday, November 13, 2007, 11:06 AM

i used to be so positive, but as i get older, I am more negative. i think it's because i have more responsibilities, young children, and no time. it takes it's toll on a person. one thing I am doing to be more positive is getting rid of the negative friends in my life and be around more positive people. This has been helping.

Tuesday, November 13, 2007, 11:09 AM

I understand that whole "positive outlook" thing... heck I have lived overseas and I KNOW how good I have it compared, but someone's outlook and veiws on life and society aren't easily changed by "look at the bright side". I see the negative outcomes easier than I see the positive, that's just who I am.

Tuesday, November 13, 2007, 11:10 AM

I am both. And I am not sure what one outweighs the other.
I think it depends on my pain level. If I am physically feeling good then it is easy for me to be possitive inside and out. But when my pain level gets unbearable I become a very cranky person and look at things in a very negative light.

I think though that as I lose weight I seem to be getting more and more hope and that helps.
I try to focus on the good and when I catch myself thinking or speaking negatively I stop and turn it around.
It takes time to change but it is working.
It also depends on what area of my life I am looking at.

Tuesday, November 13, 2007, 5:35 PM

This might be over simplified...or maybe not.

I recently watched a lecture by a professor online. Every year professors think about what they would say if they knew this was the last time they would be able to get in front of a group and talk. What would they say? What have they learned that they think worthy of passing along? Well this professor fit the bill as he is dying of cancer and only has a few months left to live. At one point in his lecture he put up a slide with a split screen, on one side is tigger, on the other is eyore (sp?). The professor says, "who are you? Guess what, your get to choose!"

Tuesday, November 13, 2007, 6:12 PM

Generally, I like to think I'm positive, but I seem to be really good at finding the flaws or 'why it can't be done' in things, and I don't always like that about myself. And if I spend time with a negative person, it makes me want to change that about myself even more, b/c I find that persistent negativity to be draining! Of course, I laughed at the season finale of Curb Your Enthusiasm where Larry says, "I'm not an inventor, I'm an improver. I see ways to improve things." That's kind of how I feel - and it IS a more positive way of seeing things :)

Tuesday, November 13, 2007, 7:41 PM

some people remark on the positive perspective i can take on things, but i can easily turn negative. i'm just starting realize this, which is helpful, cuz the more self-aware you are, the more you can grow.

Wednesday, November 14, 2007, 3:35 PM

I am a very positive person. I don't understand negative people, life is way to short to waste my time being negative.

Wednesday, November 14, 2007, 4:31 PM

I am positively negative, lol. When it comes to myself at least. That is what sucks...

Wednesday, November 14, 2007, 8:56 PM

Oh yea of little faith!!

We all have instances of both. But wallowing in negativity is fear based. I used to be negative.But once I made a connection to the Creator it changed the way I view things. I have made the choice to walk in Love not fear.

Wednesday, November 14, 2007, 10:40 PM

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