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Life stability, new job

I'm in the last week at a job I dislike, generally because I work alone and receive no word from my bosses about whether I'm doing well or poorly. It has made me lose my motivation and in turn, I find myself feeling guilty about not working hard enough. I come home after a lazy eight-hour day and then feel bad indulging myself by going to yoga or riding my bike, etc. I know that's not healthy, and I'm not looking for suggestions on how to fix it. Similarly, when I have a good day at work — meaning productive — I have no problem forgetting about it and doing whatever I wanted to at the day's end.

I am wondering whether anyone else has had this experience?

Tue. Oct 2, 11:54am

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Oh heck yeah! You just described my last job to a tee. No supervision, poorly understood work, no feedback, etc.. There is hope. I finally left that job even though it was incredibly secure and went to another where I was a complete fish out of water. It was awesome! The work was much more interesting and I felt alive and alert for the first time in years. I swear to god my brain grew three sizes in the first week alone.

Now my days are hectic and busy, but each one is a full one in which I give 100%. At the end of the day I can go home and leave it behind me even if it wasn't my greatest day because I know I truly did my best and tomorrow is another day. I now work with a great team and management I respect which is something I never want to do without again. Also the days just fly by and I still have energy when I walk out the door.

I keep my fingers crossed that you have a similar experience because I may not be in your shoes, but I think I've been in similar ones and I was miserable.

Tuesday, October 02, 2007, 3:28 PM

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OMG. I was in your shoes until recently and it was awful. I can assure you that you are not alone. I kept telling myself that it was better than it was, until one day I woke up to the realization that if there was any way to get out of it, I needed to for my mental health.

Now that I'm not doing that job anymore, I feel so much better. I encourage you to start building your exit strategy now. You won't regret it.

Tuesday, October 02, 2007, 8:50 PM

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I am at a similar job right now. I've struggled with it for over a year and I'm still miserable. I decided to stay at my job due to security and great benefits since I'll be moving across country in 6 months.

My suggestions:
- Don't be too hard on yourself. You're doing the best you can, given the situation.
- Talk to your boss about feedback and that you'd like to hear more constructive criticism or praise.
- Look for a new job. At least while you're looking, you'll feel proactive and that you're taking charge of your happiness and future.
- You're more than allowed to take time for yourself at the end of the day!! Work shouldn't last more than 8 hours IMHO and sounds like your bosses might not even notice if you put in extra time.

Wednesday, October 03, 2007, 11:11 AM

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Yes, yes, yes...been there. Let me say that when I left that job and started doing something I really loved, I realized how guilty I felt about indulging in the simplicities of life. It's not right to ever feel that way. Life is too short to be in a situation that makes you so stressed that you cannot enjoy life when you walk out of the office. It's not worth it. Is there any way you can talk to you boss, let him/her know of your frustrations with not getting any feedback? They may be wondering why the fire in you is lost, and you are wondering why they are not giving positive feedback when the fire is on! If that doesn't work, and it is a hopeless situation, don't waste life in a job that makes you feel guilty for enjoying life. I understand that more than you know. You deserve happiness and not solitude in an unrewarding job.

Wednesday, October 03, 2007, 11:17 AM

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