Seriously. WHY do men lie?????? Why??????????

My hubbie claimed he had a "dinner" to attend yesterday when in fact it was a happy hour.

He FLAT out lied and he knows it. He's an intelligent person so I know he didn't confuse the two.

I'm not going to confront him, as I am taking mother's advice, "to pick my battles". But I thought I would provoke some people here to figure out this childish behavior.

~~~Noooo, I didn't eat dirt~~~~~ Little Mikey says with bits of plant and fertilizer on his FACE.

Thu. Feb 1, 1:55pm

why don't you think confronting him is not a good idea? when he flat out lied to you? because you'd rather argue about...what? what is more important than trust in a marriage? this is a battle i strongly urge you to pick...

Thursday, February 1, 2007, 1:59 PM

does he have a reason to lie? like, have you had arguments in the past about after-work alcohol? do you not approve of an occasional happy hour? not saying that would be a good excuse-but men often want to avoid arguments and if this was the case, i could see him lying about it. if this is not your situation-then i would probably be suspicious of something else going on.

Thursday, February 1, 2007, 2:00 PM

Is it possible he could have been speaking in "shorthand"? If I did not want to give a long explanation, I might have said I had an appointment after work, or a dinner engagement. Did he meet someone for business purposes? or for pleasure?

Thursday, February 1, 2007, 2:03 PM

Do you not approve of him going to happy hour, drinking, etc.? The reason I ask is because maybe he likes to drink and knew you would get upset if he told you the truth and was trying to avoid the argument.

If you don't have a problem with it, why not just ask him why he's trying to hide it from you when he could easily just tell you the truth?

Thursday, February 1, 2007, 2:04 PM

He probably lies to you for a very good reason. Lying is a choice, and my guess is that he is not a dumb guy. He wanted to go to the bar, thought you'd give him a hard time about it. My wife fortunately is very good about this kind of thing- she knows I work hard, and that the bar is some nice me time. The same way I go out of my way to give her some Oprah time or In Touch Weekly time.

I'm pretty lucky- I don't need to lie.

-A Guy in A Great Marriage

Thursday, February 1, 2007, 2:16 PM

i'm just not understanding something...why would he "have to lie"???? if you cannot be truthful with your spouse, your lifelong partner, with whom can you be truthful? lies are small bridges that people build between each other. i like crossing those bridges and seeing what is on the other side. if you don't seek out the truth, you will have a lot of bridges built between you and these bridges will require a lot of maintenance to keep up. it can easily become a domino effect. one night he lies about going out to a happy hour. the next time he brings dinner guests over, he may have to "prep" them into what is appropriate to talk about and what not to mention. this is getting deep into deceipt. wasn't it shakespear who said, "oh what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to deceive"? i would suck up the anxiety about getting into a fight, gather up all my self-respect and discuss this with my spouse.

Thursday, February 1, 2007, 2:36 PM

OP Here

I have given him a hard time in the past, the way past. He doesn't like to drink, but he does like to occassionally hang out with friends.

I know it was indeed a work related thing, what I don't get is why he insists it was dinner. Especially since I saw the receipt, and yep, from a bar!

Should I just let it rest or say something when he gets home?

Thursday, February 1, 2007, 2:36 PM

I agree, lying is a choice, but a cowardly one.
I think it's unfair to make the wife responsible for her husband's lying. That is a poor choice he made, and she shouldn't be blamed for it. That's just as bad as men who say "I cheat because my wife doesn't understand me."
Women are expected to be so mature, so evolved, and only half as much is expected from men, if that. Men are coddled and allowed to have their cake and eat it too. If the wife doesn't approve of his drinking after work, it may have something to do with the fact that he needs to come home and spend time with the kids, or otherwise get himself engaged in the house. And why should he get free time while she has to deal with work and home?
Of course, I'm making a lot of assumptions about OP's reality, but most women these days work outside the home, raise the kids, and keep the house running. Meanwhile men work and then want to hang with their buddies, because THEY'VE had it so hard. No one's taking away the hard work they DO, but women do that and more and aren't expected to want a break themselves.
Bottom line, there is NO excuse for lying. It's a scapegoat, and an immature one at that.
I say talk to him about it, but not in an angry way. Tell him if he wanted to go to happy hour, he could have just said so, and maybe you guys can work out an agreement as to when he goes out and when you go out, separately.
This is def. something to talk about, but don't make the battle about happy hour, make it about the importance of disclosure and trust.

Thursday, February 1, 2007, 2:39 PM

DO NOT LET HIM MAKE YOU FEEL LIKE YOU DID SOMETHING WRONG FOR CALLING HIM OUT ON HIS LIE!!!
If he was willing to lie about going to the bar, he will want to do what he needs to do (like making YOU feel like the guilty one), to make his lie seem innocent, or worse, necessary.

Thursday, February 1, 2007, 2:42 PM

definitely discuss this with him. approach it as a simple question about, like, what did he have for dinner from a bar? let him know you'd rather be a little ticked off that he went out to a bar than be fuming angry and uneasy when you find he lied to you about why he went there. that's how to pick your battles.

Thursday, February 1, 2007, 2:50 PM

is the receipt for only drinks, or is it from a bar, but everyone had dinner and perhaps a few drinks? Some bars serve dinner.

Thursday, February 1, 2007, 3:09 PM

leave him alone. Trust me. Unless you have kids or some sort of trump card that will keep him in the relationship no matter how much you nag him.

You all were tone deaf to my suggestion that he lied because he knew the consequences of telling the truth. If I was in a relationship where I needed to lie to preserve my sanity, i'd be looking for a way out.

Now If I was lying about a woman or something, that is different. But the fact that he is lying over small stuff indicates that you are the problem, not him.

Thursday, February 1, 2007, 3:27 PM

who wants to play a "trump card" to make a lying man stay with them? a person who gets lied to is not the problem, no matter what. if he can't be man enough, or better yet husband enough, to tell her what he's doing, why does he want to be there? and why would she want him to stay?

Thursday, February 1, 2007, 3:34 PM

OP said, "I know it was indeed a work related thing, what I don't get is why he insists it was dinner. Especially since I saw the receipt, and yep, from a bar! "

What's the problem? I've been to a bar and ordered dinner.

Thursday, February 1, 2007, 4:14 PM

Definition of "dinner"?

Last Friday I went to a bar after work and had two beers and some fried mushrooms. I didn't eat anything else later, and I logged it under "dinner." I consider that to have been my dinner. (I'm female, if you were wondering.)

Are you positive that it isn't that the two of you define "dinner" differently?

Thursday, February 1, 2007, 4:29 PM

OP here

Clarification, hubby told me earlier in the week that he had a work related dinner to attend, he was "hosting" it.

He told me it would take a few hours, that they were going to be discussing things over "dinner".

The receipt isn't itemized so I don't know what was consumed.

For the record, I'm not upset about him actually hosting a Happy Hour, I'm concerned about the lie. Why did he feel he needed to lie, what could I have done to provoke a lie? And is it worth confronting him on. I get the concensus is to confront him in a non threatening way, so I think that's what I'll do.

Thursday, February 1, 2007, 4:44 PM

In my profession, I've gone out to many dinners/happy hours in which really, I couldn't tell you which it was! (I work in insurance, in a very professional environment for a large corporation). If we need to meet and discuss something, and we need dinner, we're just as happy sitting at a bar, with a burger and some beers, as we are sitting at a fancy restaurant. In fact, if your husband was hosting, maybe he didn't want to waste his expense account (or your personal money, if he doesn't get reimbursed) on a fancy dinner when people would be just as happy with cheap burgers and beer.

When my husband has a dinner, I tend to ask where it is, just out of curiosity. Did you ask that? If he lies about where he goes, then that's the problem. Not the location in itself.

And, for the record, my asking where he is does not mean that I don't trust him. The other night, he was on a business trip, and all of the men went to a strip club to "discuss business." It wasn't his choice, but he wasn't going to skip the event, and therefore be the "wuss" of the group, or whatever BS the "old boys club" pulls. But, he told me about it; I didn't even have to ask. It's nice to have that kind of trust!

Thursday, February 1, 2007, 5:38 PM

Men lie for the same reasons women lie.

Thursday, February 1, 2007, 6:11 PM

I go out to a "bar" for dinner & to play North America-wide trivia every Tuesday night. I've often seen people having business meetings there, over a pitcher of beer (or 6) and dinner. Many bars DO serve half decent food, you know.

Thursday, February 1, 2007, 7:46 PM

He lied to you so that you wouldn't tell him he couldn't go.

Thursday, February 1, 2007, 10:09 PM

to 2/1/07, 1009 pm

how can you speak for someone whom you've never met and know so very little about? bold of you...

Friday, February 2, 2007, 10:33 AM

It is pretty clear from this thread that most of the women simply refuse to understand the perspective of men. Bold statement, sure. But guys are simple creatures. If there is no reason to lie, then they will not do so. And the reasons can be harmless or harmful. But there is a reason, please understand that. All lies are not created equal.

-a guy

Friday, February 2, 2007, 11:04 AM

just because a guy THINKS he has to lie does not mean that there exists a real reason, it simply means that HE THINKS SO. what he may term a "reason to lie" may be him just wanting to get his way and avoid any household responsibilities. what he may term "a reason to lie" could be that he drinks too much during the week and has no time to spend with his wife. if a man feels that he has to lie in order to live his life happily within a marriage, then perhaps he is not ready for the compromises that marriage requires, or maybe the marriage itself is not healthy. to fall out of the commitment made to each other but remain married is not a great way to spend your life. end it or work it, that's my philosphy.

Friday, February 2, 2007, 11:13 AM

simple is telling the truth. telling lies complicates things. if you need to lie to the person you have made a commitment with, why are you still committed? why not move on to live a life where you don't have to lie? it makes no sense. if you are not ashamed of your actions, why do you have to lie?

Friday, February 2, 2007, 11:18 AM

I think I am getting a clear picture of why the divorce rate is north of 50%. If I was married to the majority of the responders to this thread, I'd be looking for the nearest exit.

Friday, February 2, 2007, 11:24 AM

how could you even get close enough to some of the responders' true selves when they advocate lying as a means of communication?!

Friday, February 2, 2007, 2:24 PM

many many many bars serve dinner and many many many business dinners take place at one! I would just ask him about it outright-i mean, how much was the receipt you saw? happy hour drinks are cheap-if the tab was less than $20 then you have a liar on your hand. if it was more like $50 or more-you have dinner with business associates at happy hour.

Friday, February 2, 2007, 2:53 PM

"... if the tab was less than $20 then you have a liar on your hand. if it was more like $50 or more-you have dinner with business associates at happy hour."

Why does a tab of $20 or less constitute a liar? What's the reasoning behind this? I had dinner and drinks last night with some colleagues after work ... granted we are all responsible for paying our own tab ... but I had 3 beers with my dinner and the tab was only $16.35 and that included a 20% tip for the waiter!?!?

Friday, February 2, 2007, 3:22 PM

If one is "hosting" a business dinner, as the OP's husband said he was doing, then he would be picking up the tab for everyone, and likely, being reimbursed by his company. When the company is picking up the tab, my colleagues and I will order more expensive items than we normally would, and we may pick a happy hour spot that doesn't have quite as good a deal as if we were picking up the tab ourselves. Obviously, this is not universal. But it may have been some of the basis of the respondent's assumptions. Additionally, assuming the husband was picking up the whole tab, I can't imagine a place where multiple people could have dinner and drinks for less than $20! (Though I may be a bit biased, as I live in downtown Chicago, where everything is expensive!)

Friday, February 2, 2007, 4:18 PM

did the op ever bring this up to her husband?

Thursday, February 8, 2007, 12:28 PM

It isn't just men

I'm a woman, and i do that sort of thing too. easier sometimes.

Thursday, February 8, 2007, 1:04 PM

Truth Hurts.......

I my opinion, I think you’re using the ostrich approach to your marriage. Like every reader who reads your email, we’re all thinking but to afraid to say the truth, but it’s blatantly obvious that your husband is having an affair. Why else would he have to lie about something so trivial?!?!?!?!!? I think you need you need to finally face up to the truth and see your husband for what he is, a cheating lying dog!

Wednesday, January 30, 2008, 11:34 AM

It really seems like you are arguing semantics here- He hosted an after work event with co-workers at a bar. He calls it dinner, you call it happy hour.

Seems like you are getting really worked up over nothing. Why does it matter so much to you what it's called?

If my wife says she's going out for drinks with her friends and they end up ordering food, I'm not going to freak out because she said "drinks."

Wednesday, January 30, 2008, 12:00 PM

maybe he just wanted to hang out with different people and not include you with everything. we all need a break sometimes. let our hair down. it was probably just a little white lie. he just didn't want to hurt your feelings by saying, "i have this event, but i want to go alone for a change."

Wednesday, January 30, 2008, 12:04 PM

why are we resurrecting a year-old thread?

Wednesday, January 30, 2008, 12:14 PM

because this is a free country and we have free will.

"This isn't Russia. Is this Russia? This isn't Russia."

-Ty Webb

Wednesday, January 30, 2008, 12:17 PM

I think people lie just in order to get around something.

If he wanted to go out to see his friends at the bar, but you either disapprove or give him a hard time about either, hanging out with his friends instead of his family or going to the bar...he probably just wanted to go and made up the lie so you wouldn't get mad at him.

If one of those are true, then I think that you should sit down and think...it could be worse, he could be out cheating....he just wants to hang out with the guys.

You should sit down and talk to him about it though. It doesn't have to be an arguement! If you yell at him, of course he will have to be on the defensive and yell back. Speak calmly and maybe you can work something out with him.

My bf (of over 6 yrs) goes out for beer every Friday night after work...and this gives me the time for myself, I can take a bath, read etc...do whatever I want to do...

Wednesday, January 30, 2008, 2:46 PM

Maybe it was originally supposed to be a dinner, then they decided to do it over drinks instead. You indicated that EARLIER in the week he told you that they were going for dinner....plans can change from one minute to the next.

Wednesday, January 30, 2008, 2:50 PM

I agree with 2:50

It's most likely that. He's not a child so he probably thought ... well I'm still going out...do I have to check in with my wife first to let her know that we're going for drinks instead of dinner.

Of course not.

Wednesday, January 30, 2008, 2:55 PM

Heres my opinion... it may be cynical, but I am a thirty four year old divorced woman. I think men lie because they are men. I have met very few honest men in my time that are completely and totally honest with their loved ones right down from what they did for lunch, happy hour, how much money they spent, what ex girlfriend they ran into at the store, what they do when we are not around. I just know that there are many reasons guys lie. Not saying women dont do it to, but men just do. Botttom line. They dont want to deal with "nagging" "bitching" "whining" or any other word they use for it, so it's easier for them to just lie. And then they do...

Thursday, January 31, 2008, 1:49 PM

he lied because he has difficulty being honest. he is either trying to maintain control of his actions by hiding behind his lies or he is tryin to avoid conflict. people who lie do so find it more comfortable for them at the time. i am a woman by the way.

Thursday, April 10, 2008, 9:41 AM

I don't think he lied at all. Why are you inspecting the receipt and thus treating him like a criminal. It's all semantics...dinner, happy hour, grab a bite to eat...whatever. If you bring this up he is going to feel that you are tracking his every move and then he will be resentful and that will only lead to actual lies to avoid further snooping on your part.

As to the poster who thinks her husband is having an affair...geez! You barely have any information and already you are throwing a snake into the pit. No wonder men go crazy about women and our meddling - we worry about such stupid things sometimes.

Yup, I'm a woman!

Thursday, April 10, 2008, 9:58 AM

I agree with 9:58 its all semantics.

yep woman as well.

Thursday, April 10, 2008, 8:12 PM

This thread is kinda funny. I used to hang out with a friend/guy who lived with another woman. He and I used to have "dinner" or "lunch"... Men lie because they want a convenient way to explain where they have been or what they have been doing when they don't want to tell the truth. Same reason women do it. I am not married but when I was, my husband did the same thing. Mens version of the truth often includes the little white lies as well as the big ones to cover things up. Although my ex didnt cheat on me, he lied about all kinds of crap. Insignificant crap that you wonder why he lies about, but he did. I guess like 1:49 said, he is definately trying to avoid the bitching, whining, nagging, etc... that guys tend to call it.

Friday, April 11, 2008, 9:04 AM

men lie when women keep to tight of a rein and recon on their activities - we need freedom.

Friday, April 11, 2008, 10:03 AM

As a wife, I think men lie in order to shorten conversations. I live with my husband, and (intermittently) 2 sons, ages 22 & 19. It is hard as hell to have an actuall conversation.

For instance, with my sister, it is, " I went out to dinner last night"; "who did you go with?"; "my girlfriend sue and ann and ann's brother, who is visiting in town", "really, where is he from?, I think I met ann before, is she married?" ETC, ETC.

With a husband, he might say "I grabbed a bite to eat after work," me:"where did you go?", "to The Ritz," "You went by yourself?". "Damn, why the third degree, don't you eat out sometimes, do I ask you about every move you make?"
Now, am I a controlling bitch? or am I attempting to have a conversation with my husband that I might also have with my sister or any other friend?

Would it be easier to lie and say he worked late or could he actually have a conversation with his wife?

Friday, April 11, 2008, 10:37 AM

I think it's important that Op mentioned keeping quiet because she wanted to pick her battles. While that is wise advice sometimes, I think there may be a lack of communication here. (yes, I'm an armchair therapist :) He lies about the type of event because you've given him a hard time in the past and he doesn't want to get into a fight about it, you catch him in the lie and you don't want to confront him because you don't want to fight about it. Start talking to each other! Hash it out, and honestly this shouldn't be the kind of thing that starts a fight. Lay out your expectations for each other and find some way to compromise.

Friday, April 11, 2008, 12:33 PM

I don't agree with the posters that say all men lie. Why do you say that? That is stereotyping? That's like saying all women are bad drivers (which, yes I know is said but is also not true) I've been married for 17 years, yes I've lied to my husband in the past, before I was more mature about communication and relationships and he called me out on it and was truly hurt. (not anything to do with cheating or anything like that, it was more finance stuff) but I can honestly say I believe he has NEVER lied to me. Maybe to tell me I'm beautiful or something like that (which I'm not! LOL!) but I trust the man and I truly believe he does not lie to me. Call me ignorant or whatever you want but I think to say all men lie is a really unfair statement.

Friday, April 11, 2008, 2:14 PM

EVERYONE LIES!

Friday, April 11, 2008, 3:58 PM

My 2 cents

Dinner, happy hour, blah blah blah. Do you trust the man or not? If so, let it go. If not , I suggest taking a god hard look at why you do not. Happy hour does not equal an affair, happy hour does not mean he is not willing to do his share of the house work, but it is not OK for anyone to say that the lies can be rationalized.

Marriage is tough. I get what you are saying about picking your battles. Life is too short to be picking the man apart unless he has given you much more reason to focus on this crap.

Friday, April 11, 2008, 5:43 PM

I love the poster that has been married for 17 years and thinks her husband never has lied, lmao. Sorry sweetie, but it is kinda cute. :) Everyone lies now and then. He may be a great guy, but I am sure he more than likely has told you a whopper at some point over those 17 years. It doesnt mean you divorce him. It just means he is human.

Saturday, April 12, 2008, 12:31 AM

lies...

Perfect timing that I found this thread. I have been married just under 4 mos. 2nd time around for both of us. My last marriage included much of the talked about shorthand talk, white lies, then bigger lies, (by my husband) and finally got to the point of no return when the lies inclued other women. In the beginning though it was the out to dinner, out with the boys, etc. He is in law enforcement and I knew he needed the stress relief so I did not complain or nag at first. When it got to be every night though, I admit, I bitched & nagged & cried a lot. I was very hurt by it all and anger got to be my only defense mechanism. Anyway, in this new marriage, I have already experienced him not telling me when he wants to hang out with his friends.. he will say he is going one place and ending up at another...and I can always tell he is not being truthful. I have talked to him about it and he said he does not think it is lying...he has also said he feels there will be a confrontation. I know I am ultra-sensitive to this subject and am really trying not to over re-act because I want this marriage to work. Once again though I just feel extremely hurt. I am a very independent, open minded, and generally easy going woman but infedility and lying are not acceptable to me on any level... I dont mind if he goes out now and then, I do too. I just dont get it though, I am starting to think I have some kind of a sign on my head that says... Lie to me. Needless to say, not feeling much marital bliss right now. The articles on here have helped me to understand both sides... It just scares me to death to think I may I may be facing the same type of scenario as my first marrige. This did not happen when we were dating... not that I know of anyway.. Hoping someone out there can tell me they faced it, talked about it, and worked it all out. Looking for a potential happy ending I guess.

Thursday, April 17, 2008, 2:12 PM

When you met and/or started dating was he seeing someone else? Did the dominant male role model in your life behave in such a way?

Thursday, April 17, 2008, 4:24 PM

why do men lie

No, he was not seeing someone else when we first met, it had been a few months. He did date over the 5 yrs he was divorced though but nothing too serious since his son took up much of his time and he was careful about dating because of his son. The dominant male role in my life to my knowledge (my dad) did not lie, he died when I was 23 and I don't recall that ever being an issue. BUT as I said in my first email, my Ex-husband was a master at lying. could look you in the eye and tell a bold face one. I knew in my heart but he was so convincing for so long... then It all blew up. Still looking for some advice. Aly

Monday, April 21, 2008, 9:26 AM

My first husband lied to me all the time. About everything: big stuff, small stuff, and everything in between. He'd go out with the guys after work and not call, make up elaborate stories about where he'd been, then we'd fight when he finally did get home(drunk, in the wee hours of the am). I'd ask him why he hadn't called me, or let me know in advance, then I could make plans with my friends or I'd be happy to go out with him. He would blame it on all kinds of things-not himself, though. Some of the 'reasons' I thought I could fix, but nothing changed his behavior. I finally realized this was just the way he was, and nothing I could do or say would change him. I learned something else, something important: it wasn't my fault. He wanted the security of a loving wife and child at home, but he had no clue how and no desire to be the other giving person in that relationship. People like him are in limbo-they want the security and love of a commited relationship, yet they also want the freedom of not having to answer to anyone else. So they try to do both, and it is very destructive to the person they are with. You end up in limbo, too, because you can't have the relationship you need and deserve. They make you almost become the mother. That is no role for a wife. The fact that you have only been married four months and he wasn't this way before you married him, probably means he was this way but he hid it from you. I had 9 miserable years (for the most part) with my ex. The last 14 years I've been married to a really great guy. Sometimes the happy ending isn't what you expected...I hope this helped. Good luck.

Monday, April 21, 2008, 6:16 PM

is it possible he was embarressed to bring you? Is that what is really bothering you?

Tuesday, April 22, 2008, 1:38 PM

April 22 1:38

DICK!

Tuesday, April 22, 2008, 3:34 PM

To 1:38

Somehow knew someone would say that. No, that wasn't it. I was a stage performer and in beauty pageants. Looks wasn't the issue. Trust me, you should've seen his second wife!

Wednesday, April 23, 2008, 12:46 AM

Also to April 22 1:38

We went out together on the weekends. Most of the time he would pull this stuff during the week, or on payday fridays. And his "reasons" were stuff like the house wasn't decorated enough, there weren't enough pictures on the wall to make it feel like home, just stupid stuff. Whatever he could come up with on the spot. And, speaking of stupid stuff, if you don't have anything intelligent or helpful to post, why do you bother?

Wednesday, April 23, 2008, 1:04 AM

Al-Anon....plenty of resources on line. Also, you might check out an author named Melody Beattie.....most helpful.

Wednesday, April 23, 2008, 6:01 PM

and to answer your original queston....

Men (myself included) lie because we aren't getting true satisfaction from life from within, but through outside means (women, work, drugs/booze, food, pick any addiction), and we feel that by 'beating the system', we are somehow above it.

Wednesday, April 23, 2008, 6:04 PM

why men lie

Thank u for all your comments. I will take something from each of them and hopefully make good decisions. I will not be a mother to my husband nor will I wake up 15 yrs from now (like before) or even 15 weeks from now and be in the same position. If he chooses to continue to lie then that is his choice. I cannot change that nor do I want to try. I would still like to believe that there are people (men and women) out there in which infidelity and lying are simply not acceptable. There is no excuse to treat the person you profess to love with such disrespect. Thank you again .... Aly

Friday, April 25, 2008, 2:43 PM

Liars!!

Why do men feel it is somehow o.k. to lie? In my world, small lies eventually snowball into lies where there is no turning back. If you have nothing to hide and are doing nothing wrong, why lie? Do you guys honestly think that we are that fragile that we are gonna break at the drop of a hat? The truth is, you are all afraid that we are stronger than you think. How's bout tellin the truth for a change with sincerity and see how we act rather than worrying about the worst?

Saturday, July 11, 2009, 5:41 AM

Lies...almost never justified

Being a guy myself I am gonna stick my neck out here...I will admit that I have been caught in a lie or two in my day. And sometimes couples don't look past the actual act of telling a lie to understand what the reason may be and if it is justified. Most times there is not a legitimate reason for it but you have to get past the hurt of being lied to a try to put yourself in the other person's shoes to see what their logic is for why they felt the need to lie. Again, I am absolutely not condoning it, but sometimes their may be a reason for it. Now lies that involve someone cheating on their spouse or significant other are certainly not justified. And believe it or not their are some ppl that lie uncontrollably just like breathing...they can't help it.

Saturday, July 11, 2009, 5:14 PM

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