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calling all men...

hey, guys! there is a discussion on the boards about men & women really being "just friends", and we need your input please! thanks!

Mon. Sep 18, 4:10pm

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this means you, man nurse...and others...

Monday, September 18, 2006, 4:31 PM

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many men won't respond because they are not really interested in all this "talk" ....again proving my point that men and women are different. Maybe if you change the topic to "one night stands" or "friends with benefits" more men would respond! :)

Monday, September 18, 2006, 4:43 PM

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i agree with the above poster, men are from mars and women are from venus, I dont think men and women can just be friends men always have a dirty mind and women are so damn senstive they always wana talk and stuff.

Monday, September 18, 2006, 4:46 PM

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What man in his right mind would set foot in that thread? Thus far it seems to be a bunch of women mainly saying that men just want one thing.

Monday, September 18, 2006, 5:38 PM

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Do you want the truth? You can't handle the truth!!! The truth is it is easier to be friends with a lesser than hot girl/woman than it is a hot one. If you are a normal man, there is only one thing on your mind. And if she is super smart, classy and intelligent, it is even worse. Stupid girls turn me off-- and vice versa. flame away.....

Monday, September 18, 2006, 6:16 PM

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Thank you 6:16 for saying it like it is :) I appreciate your honesty.

Monday, September 18, 2006, 6:35 PM

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I should add that it is also not about looks or even weight necessarily. A woman's personality is a big deal. Overall sexiness is the big deal for me. A woman who is confident, in touch with her body, maybe as minimal mommy and daddy issues (too much to ask in most cases) is the ideal. I also think that chemistry is everything. If two *people* have chemistry, then game on.

Monday, September 18, 2006, 6:42 PM

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i don't buy that all men only want sex all the time. have some respect, people. have you ever hung out with intellectuals with more to discuss than the hot ass on the girl next door? i think you all should broaden your horizons and get out and meet some real men, not these shells of real men you seem to be so familiar with. how can you just categorize an entire gender with such shallow characteristics?

Tuesday, September 19, 2006, 9:07 AM

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Men can have an intelligent conversation, of course. They are just different than women. If you are in a restaurant having one of these conversations and a hot girl walks in the me, his mind is there with the hot girl. It's not bad at all. It's healthy and normal, men and women are just different.

Tuesday, September 19, 2006, 9:17 AM

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men and women are different? You are not allowed to say that! The (wildly popular) President of Harvard got run out of town saying that there were differences between men and women. Repeat after me-- we are all equal, and all beliefs are morally equivalent.... argue otherwise at your peril....

Tuesday, September 19, 2006, 9:24 AM

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this stereotypical viewpoint is damaging to healthy socializing. obviously men and women are "different" than each other, but to categorically say that all men are more interested in sex than anything else is plain wrong. i think the people who think this are the ones with sex-on-the-brain.

Tuesday, September 19, 2006, 9:48 AM

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I agree with the president of Harvard and I am a man.

Tuesday, September 19, 2006, 10:08 AM

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Also if I had the opportunity to have an intelligent discussion with a woman or sex with a hot girl. My choice would be the sex.

Tuesday, September 19, 2006, 10:09 AM

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I've never known a guy to keep a harem of "just friends."

Women do this all the time. "Just friends" really seems to mean "you're up if this doesn't work out."

At least guys are honest about what they want.

Tuesday, September 19, 2006, 12:41 PM

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most of these viewpoints are totally sexist. it's not even an educated discussion anymore.

Tuesday, September 19, 2006, 12:44 PM

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ah, finally a women's studies major steps into the debate. This is so typcial of the leftist pc mindset. Forget logic, lets just get emotional and call things a bunch of names. And do it loudly enough that everyone else just gives up.

I think there is a lot of honesty here. We all say one thing but think another. It is easier that way. If I was asked in person if I thought that women and men could just be friends, 'd be like "oh, absolutely." But really think a lot of the things that have been said on this thread.

And the term sexist- what does that mean? I think someone on the thread said they were more attracted to intelligent women. Is it sexist to be attracted to a smart woman? Another pointed out how they like women's personality, confidence. Is that sexist.

I think it was Nigel who said "there is a fine line between sexist and sexy"

Tuesday, September 19, 2006, 1:10 PM

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no- it was "there is a fine line between clever and stupid."

Tuesday, September 19, 2006, 1:12 PM

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"most of these viewpoints..."

10 results for: most
View results from: Dictionary | Thesaurus | Encyclopedia | the Web Unabridged (v 1.0.1) - Cite This Source
man?y /'m?ni/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[men-ee] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation adjective, more, most, noun, pronoun

–adjective 1. constituting or forming a large number; numerous: many people.
2. noting each one of a large number (usually fol. by a or an): For many a day it rained.
–noun 3. a large or considerable number of persons or things: A good many of the beggars were blind.
4. the many, the greater part of humankind.
–pronoun 5. many persons or things: Many of the beggars were blind. Many were unable to attend.

Tuesday, September 19, 2006, 1:18 PM

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• noun prejudice, stereotyping, or discrimination, typically against women, on the basis of sex.

— DERIVATIVES sexist adjective & noun.

from the oxford english dictionary.

Tuesday, September 19, 2006, 1:23 PM

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1244 poster here

when i said that most of these posts were sexist, i meant against men. and i meant most, not all, of the comments that were made were sexist.

Tuesday, September 19, 2006, 1:25 PM

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"forget logic, lets (sic) just get emotional and call things a bunch of names."

do you mean like, "..a women's study major", or "...the leftist pc mindset"???

Tuesday, September 19, 2006, 1:28 PM

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Harvard, among, between

I'd like to know (9:24 poster) exactly who the president of Harvard was popular with. The students, maybe, but they always like the president, unless there is an alcohol crackdown.

The guy was investigated on suspicion of helping to defraud the federal government -- and is best buddies with the guy who definitely did. Just what Harvard needed. He also instituted a different kind of "top down" university governance, which was naturally not popular with the faculty. (I'd say it remains to be seen whether or not such reorganizations are a good idea.) The press gives a lot of attention to his stupid remarks, but it wasn't as if he was in good shape before he made them.

I suppose this isn't really on-topic. But IMHO, any statement that goes, "Men are like......" or "Women always.... " is incorrect concerning about 70% of the people being referred to. There are a LOT more differences among men, or among women, than there are between the "average" man and the "average" woman.

Tuesday, September 19, 2006, 1:39 PM

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Larry Summers was hated by the left leaning faculty and greatly admired by the students. Because unlike most of the professors there, he had actually done something in the real world, other than cozy up to facist dictators and other cool enemies of the US. He could speak their language, had made money- like the majority of students do. Naturally, he inspired rage. I love him for that.

Tuesday, September 19, 2006, 1:47 PM

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like the majority of students want to do.

Tuesday, September 19, 2006, 1:47 PM

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I'm a female, and I love intellectual conversations. But I'd still rather have sex with a hot guy than have an intellectual conversation with him! Or, maybe have sex, and then have an intellectual conversation.

But if I'm somewhere and a guy walks in with great looks and a hot body that he's showing off through a tight t-shirt or whatnot, then my mind isn't on the conversation anymore either.

So maybe we're not all that different!

Oh, and yes, I have many male friends. Most of them I would consider dating if we were both single. (I'm married). The ones that I wouldn't consider dating, there's a reason other than their personalities. Usually it's something cultural, or differences in what we like to do in our free time (like if he's a huge partier or something)

Tuesday, September 19, 2006, 5:53 PM

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To the Summers supporters

Summers questioned women's innate ability in math and science. It was an out there comment. He was absolutely free to make his comment and others were absolutely free to respond. That is the very core of academic freedom and free speech - people are allowed to share their ideas and others are allowed to question, comment, respond etc.

It's worth noting that a recent report finds not that women lack ability in math and science but rather the US is squandering the potential contributions of women in science and engineering which is a problem for our entire country.


Wednesday, September 20, 2006, 7:07 AM

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the sad reality is that there is actually very little academic and speech freedom on campuses these days. If someone comes out with the "wrong" idea, that contradicts liberal dogma, that person will become the target of vicious attack. The nuts at Harvard were looking for a reason to burn him at the stake, and his comments (which I truly have no opinion of, and wish he kept is mouth shut) gave them that opportunity.

Wednesday, September 20, 2006, 8:07 AM

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sort of the same response when one gets when posting beliefs about the possibility and success of opposite sex friendships on this site....

Wednesday, September 20, 2006, 8:43 AM

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lol. I think in general people like to view the world the way they want to see it, or the way they want it to be, rather than the way it is.

Wednesday, September 20, 2006, 12:48 PM

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who's to say how "it really is"?

Wednesday, September 20, 2006, 2:40 PM

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Rudy Guiliani was a great one at this. He used to start off every difficult question with "well, the reality is....." and then he'd go on to paint the reality as he saw it. I think it is a pretty interesting technique.

Rudy 08!!!!

Wednesday, September 20, 2006, 3:33 PM

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Somebody asked my opinion about guys and girls just being friends. I think I may have on the other thread but i have something to add i guess. Especially because I have no idea what i put before. I have women friends that I know I could not date because most are married or in a relationship, I even have a woman friend whom is single and I at first wanted to date but considered that this is really not the time and possibly not the right girl. I don't really want to get into a relationship if I know it won't work, its just unecessary emotional trauma. I cannot describe the perfect relationship but if i were to try, I would be totally comfortable, and able to talk with the other person, not just intellectually but also just about how I feel and reminiscing, and nurture the relationship type of conversations where you could spend hours on the phone or hours face to face talking and not want it to end because you have so much to say and your so focused on that other individual and are so interested on her responses to your questions and you want to see her face light up when you say something funny and crinkle up when you say something totally stupid or insane but she forgives you because she is liking the conversation as well and you have said so many other witty and wonderful things, and then you can't believe its midnight and you have to go home or hang up and get some sleep before work or class tomorrow. Those are the types of relationships that are wonderful and mean the most. Cheap one night stands and jumping head first into a relationship and do you love me, and when are we getting married relationships are not my ideal. Let me decide if you are the person I want forever. forever. forever. I don't think people take it that seriously and when one of the partners in a relationship are pressured into making a commitment the relationship is already over. I would like to make my own decisions thank you very much.

As a nursing student and working in the medical field I have had my fare share of women wanting more out of a friendship when I didn't and it usually ended the friendships. I have also kept in contact with friends that were married but we weren't as good a friends because of the husband factor. The best friends are the single women because they have no attachments to a man and nobody to get jelous, I am not saying that all men will get jelous but I think its human nature to at least be a little suspicious of a man being friends with your wife so I understand. so keeping your distance with a woman with a man is appropriate or the other way around, a man with a woman.

As far as women and men being different. Everbody is different, there are pluses and minuses of every individual and nobody has any right to judge others unless they are mean,hahaha just kidding. even then I bet if you get to the root of the problem and they have it in them to remedy their problem they can be as nice as everybody else. The problem lies when that mean person doesn't want to change then all you can do is stear clear. You can be friends with somebody when you don't agree with them and you can be nice to people that arent' nice to you what good would it do to recipricate an ugly insensitive action.

I think I have wrote a lot on this topic and I hope that ya'll made it through it all and I hope you all got a chance to read it, it actually came from the heart and seems to be simple but I know how people like to turn there backs on issues right in front of their face. Let me know if ya'll want more input or have questions on what I said. It would make me very warm and fuzzy inside to have some feedback from ya'll. Have a good weekend.


Friday, September 22, 2006, 10:49 AM

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