Sex life-Weight Gain

What is the deal with this horrible inverse relationship! I hate that I feel so much more self-concious and think my boyfriend detests my body even when he says he loves it. Not taking care of my body means a dramatic decrease in sex drive for me.

I wonder if there is any scientific evidence which proves that being overweight (or maybe just thinking it) can actually affect your sex drive?
Anyone else?

Fri. Sep 2, 9:46am

That's definitely a good reason to take care of your body!

But really, when a guy looks at your body, he's thinking "oh my g-d, she's letting me touch her boobs!! I can't believe I actually get to have sex!!!" There is no possible way that he hates your body - he's just excited that you'll let him touch it and see it and whatever else you let him do! He'll be happier if you're more comfortable, because then he gets to see more and have more sex! They just want to relish all the soft curves that us girls have, that they don't get!

Friday, September 2, 2005, 10:55 AM

True!

That is pure comedy though.

Friday, September 2, 2005, 12:34 PM

body and sex

actually there have been several studies on perceived body image and sexual functioning, all of which are quite interesting. anyhow, i say if he seems to like/ love your body, then take that as a positive cue.
personally, i'm not currently in a regular sexual relationship and i find my weight increases:( some people think this is a crazy idea, but really - how many calories are you cutting if you're having sex 4-5 times a week in addition to your cardio/ strength training workout? my theory is more sex, less weight!
so, i'm having a difficult time loving my body right now, but i try to keep focused and motivated. always acknowledging my positive traits!

Friday, September 2, 2005, 1:09 PM

on the upside

My husband loves my body and always has - - when we first met and I was a skinny little hottie, when I tipped the scales at nearly 200 when I was pregnant, and all the stages in between. However, now that I'm exercising and trying to get back into shape (maybe even back to "skinny little hottie"), I myself am becoming much more comfortable with my body. And I think my confidence is exuding sexiness. My always-loving husband is even more interested in sex, and he makes me feel sexier. And, yes, we have more sex, and yes, I do think it's really contributing to my weightloss efforts. It's one big happy cycle: I exercise and workout --> I look better --> I feel sexier --> we have more sex --> I get more toned --> etc...

Friday, September 2, 2005, 7:12 PM

I agree that there is a direct link. When I am happy about the way my body looks I am 200x's more confident and that presents itself during sex. When I met my husband I was comfortable with my appearance and wanted him to see/touch me whenever possible.

Now that I have put on weight, I am very self conscience in the bedroom and don't want him to look at me. He of course could care less and wants me just as much if not more. Needless to say this is causeing some problems in our relationship.

Monday, September 26, 2005, 12:16 PM

I put on a pair of big hoop earrings that I haven't worn since high school this weekend - I always wear tiny diamond studs - and suddenly, I looked totally different, and sexy! My fiance thought so too - and couldn't keep his hands off me all weekend!! I swear, the stupid little earrings made a bigger difference than all the dieting and weight loss I've done combined!! It's the little things that make a difference!

Monday, September 26, 2005, 12:30 PM

Honey, Don't!

When I met my husband, I found myself being chased around by an erection, yelling "Honey, don't!" and laughing my head off.

After gaining 20 pounds while we were together, I found myself getting chased around by an erection, yelling "Honey, don't!" and laughing my head off.

After gaining 50 pounds while we were together, I found myself getting chased around by an erection, muttering "honey, don't" and crying my head off. I then found myself being wrapped up in his arms with my head placed on his chest and my forehead being kissed, being told "I love you" and "have I told you today how beautiful you are?", and being softly and gently cuddled and hugged.

After that, my husband found himself getting chased around, yelling "honey, please DO!" and laughing his head off.

How you feel about yourself absolutely effects your sex life. When you have higher confidence and self-esteem, you exude sexuality and men can't keep their horny little hands off of you. You feeling good about your sex life may be about YOU, not about him. Because, if I understand it right, my guess is that your guy loves you the way you are and can't wait until the next time you let him eye that gorgeous bod of yours! Trust me-- try saying "Honey, DO!"

Monday, September 26, 2005, 1:54 PM

Yes, sex can be adversely affected by how we feel about our bodies and how our bodies are cooperating during sex. If your feeling self concious you're either feeling insecure about your partner or your body type is interfering with the fun you've come to enjoy.

When I've trusted my partner I've enjoyed sex as a full figured woman.

Monday, September 26, 2005, 3:13 PM

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