CommunityBrowse groupsBlogEtiquetteInvite Your friendsSuccess Stories


My Mom has the key to our house...

I made the mistake of giving my Mom the key to our house for emergencies, but instead of using the key for emergencies, she shows up constantly. Sometimes she doesn't even knock before she comes in. We have almost no privacy anymore. She lives in the same town and my Dad is not alive, so she's lonely. I hate to hurt her feelings. Does anyone have any ideas about how I can approach the subject?

Tue. Jan 28, 9:15pm

Add comment  
Maybe you can change the lock, and tell her that you lost your keys so had to get the lock changed. Then when she asks for the keys to the new lock, just keep putting her off. Not the best way to handle it, but ...
And in the mean time, maybe you can get her involved in some social activities so she'll have more things to occupy her time.

This is why I never gave my in-laws the keys to our house even though they complained that all their friends' children give them the keys to their houses.

Thursday, January 30, 2014, 11:45 AM

Add comment
I think it's your house and you tell her that you have a lot going on but you love seeing her too. Or you should just put up with it. She is your mother.

Friday, January 31, 2014, 2:09 PM

Add comment
I'm sure there will be some reaction - hurt feelings, defensiveness, something…people who have a healthy regard for boundaries won't just let themselves into someone else's home. From week to week does she know when she's able to see you or talk to you (i.e., do you talk regularly, have her over for dinner, go to her home, etc.) If you're caught up with life and days and weeks go by without any contact it might help to establish a regular schedule of calls and visits so she feels less an urge to help herself to your home. LIke you said - she could be very lonely.

"Mom, I hope this doesn't hurt your feelings, when I gave you that key it was meant for emergencies. I'm sorry if I didn't make that clear. I love having you over, but I need you to call first to see if it's a good time. Letting yourself in without notice isn't working for us."

Sunday, February 02, 2014, 2:41 PM

Add comment


Thursday, August 23, 2018, 5:23 AM

Add comment

Related Content:

How To Lose Weight- The Basics
Weight Watchers Points System
The Fat Smash Diet
The Eat To Live Diet
The Beck Diet Solution
How To Get The Motivation To Lose Weight


How To Be Successful Using PEERtrainer

How To Burn Fat
Online Weight Loss Support- How It Works
Does Green Tea Help You Lose Weight?
Tips On Using PEERtrainer
Visit The PEERtrainer Community
Diet and Fitness Resources


Weight Watchers Meetings
Learning To Inspire Others: You Already Are
Writing Down Your Daily Workouts
Spending Money On A Personal Trainer?
How I Became A Marathon Runner


Preventive Health

How To Prevent Injuries During Your Workout
Flu Season: Should You Take The Flu Shot?
Are You Really Ready To Start PEERtrainer?
Super Foods That Can Boost Your Energy
Reversing Disease Through Nutrition

New Diet and Fitness Articles:

Weight Watchers Points Plus
How To Adjust Your Body To Exercise
New: Weight Watchers Momentum Program
New: PEERtrainer Blog Archive
Review Of The New Weight Watchers Momentum Program

Weight Loss Motivation by Joshua Wayne:

Why Simple Goal Setting Is Not Enough
How To Delay Short Term Gratification
How To Stay Motivated
How To Exercise With A Busy Schedule

Real World Nutrition and Fitness Questions

Can Weight Lifting Help You Lose Weight?
Are Protein Drinks Safe?
Nutrition As Medicine?

Everyday Weight Loss Tips

How To Eat Healthy At A Party
How To Eat Out And Still Lose Weight
The Three Bite Rule
Tips On How To Stop A Binge