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Need to vent

Why do people feel the need to tell you how to lose weight?

I lost 40 lbs since June. Today I saw a friend that I haven't seen for a while. She commented that I look good, and I told her that I've been dieting. Then she proceeds to give me advice on how to lose weight. This girl has always been skinny and never had to diet in her life.

The my mother-in-law comes over in the evening with some food. I told her that we don't eat as much these days, and then she starts telling me what I need to do to lose weight.

Hello???? I've lost 40 lbs. I think I know how to lose weight. And it's not just them. When people know that I've lost weight, they start to tell me HOW to lose weight. It just bugs me to no end. Why can't they stop at, "You look good." Am I being too sensitive?

Mon. Feb 6, 9:16pm

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Either people think they're being helpful or everyone wants to be a know-it-all. Or it's a little of both. It depends on how you want to frame it.

Maybe next time the skinny friend starts to tell you how to lose weight you can say something like, "wow, I never knew you had to diet to lose weight! how much weight did you lose? How many years have you been maintaining?"

Or you can say, "Thanks for your expertise on how you lost weight but what I'd really like is your advice on how you've maintained your weight loss, since I obviously already *know* how to lose weight." (too passive-aggressive?)

Monday, February 06, 2012, 9:29 PM

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depending on the person . . . . they just may be trying to make conversation . . . . Give them -your- hints...

You lost 40 lbs! PROPS Girl!!!

Monday, February 06, 2012, 11:51 PM

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Maybe listen and see if they're saying anything of value. My friend lost 50 pounds and looked awesome. Then she gained it all right back b/c her weight loss strategy was goofy and unsustainable. You may be doing everything right. Who knows. But assume good will on the part of others. Sometimes the rest of us are just making conversation without knowing how annoying we can be!

Tuesday, February 07, 2012, 1:52 PM

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Thanks for great advice. Now that I've had a chance to cool down, I know they both meant well.

Tuesday, February 07, 2012, 3:00 PM

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