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having trouble

I am having trouble getting motivated to exersise. I got laughed at in the gym the other day and I am having a difficult time getting to the gym. I get there and then turn around and come home without even going in. Does anyone have any advice on how to gain motivation and stuff to work out every day? Thanks

Fri. Oct 31, 10:53am

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Honey if I were there I would sooo go with you. :-( But I seem to recall from your previous thread that you live midwest and I live halfway across the country.

I don't have any easy advice - at some point you have to make the decision to walk through that door and just get on with it. This is coming from someone who had a gym membership for 6 months before I ever used it because I had gym phobia so bad. The only reason I went is because I couldn't bring myself to cancel it without going at least once and pretty soon I was hooked. The more you do it, the easier it gets if that helps.

Couple questions though:
Do you like this gym other than the people who made you feel bad?

Is there another gym you could try? It's possible you would feel more comfortable in a different gym - they all have a different 'vibe' if you will.

As for motivation to work out everyday? For me - I HAVE to make working out a priority. That means I put time in my schedule for it, and I've even arranged my work so it's more convenient for me to work out when I most like to do so. For example I can't get up and work out, but I can get up and go to work, so I work 6:30 to 3:30 (fortunately my employer is flexible with the scheduling), then I hit the exercise equipment on the way home and then I'm done in time to make dinner. Dinner is usually healthier because I don't like to eat junk after a good workout. I have my clothes ready and waiting in a bag under my purse the night before - it's too convenient to 'forget' or not have time. I don't run any errands or do anything else after work until I've worked out.

If I don't put exercise on my list of priorities and MAKE it a priority, it doesn't get done. And that's a shame, because diet works, but diet and exercise works 2x faster. Plus I have health issues stemming from an old injury and that means I need exercise - you'd think that'd keep me motivated, but not even that keeps me on track. Scheduling it and making it happen are the only things that work for me.

Best wishes!!! You can do this - we're all with you in spirit if not the flesh. :-)

Friday, October 31, 2008, 11:30 AM

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Don't let those bratty girls win.
Go back, work hard, sweat, and get healthy for yourself. People say mean things about others everyday, most of them are not caught. Don't let them get to you. Unfortunately there is no cure for stupidity.
You've made a decision to get healthy. You are on PEERtrainer and you have your gym membership. Stick to that plan no matter the obstacles!

Friday, October 31, 2008, 12:07 PM

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Don't let ANYONE allow you to veer off your path to health!

Get back on that horse and ride it!

Friday, October 31, 2008, 12:12 PM

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I would recommend finding a buddy. If you don't have a friend who would want to go with you maybe your gym has a buddy-up board (my old gym did. people posted their workout interests and times they go and then someone could contact them to meet up for workouts).

I belong to the same gym as my boyfriend, my roommate and my best friend, as well as a few other friends. I have also made friends with some people in my swim class as well as the instructor. My best friend and I swim and spin together 3-4 days a week so we are always accountable to each other. My boyfriend is always pushing me in the weight-lifting department. I have never stuck to working out as much as I do now with all this built in support.

Friday, October 31, 2008, 12:35 PM

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What I'm going to say is in no way to minimize what those girls did or how it made you feel, or even to discredit gym phobia because I think it can be very daunting for people to take that step. Having said that though, you need to toughen your skin and do what's best for you. It's not best for you to sit in that parking lot and not go in. Don't use what those women said as an excuse to not exercise. Sometimes what's best for you isn't easy, but it can't be any worse than feeling crappy about yourself for being overweight. There's only one way to change your life and that's going to require you to get out of your comfort zone and deal with whatever comes your way, as ugly as it can be. If you let what someone said keep you from exercising, you have just given someone else control of your life, and why give that to people who could care less about you? You take the control because no one is going to care more about you than yourself!!! :) The best thing you could do to prove them wrong is show up every day....if you don't go in you'll hate yourself and you'll justify what they're thinking about you., that you don't belong there. SO DON'T GIVE THAT TO THEM!!!

Friday, October 31, 2008, 1:55 PM

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How To Get Motivated To Exercise: Understand and Remind Yourself Of Your Key Motivation

This is a link to an article recently published on PT by Joshua Wayne, and it touches on this issue.



Friday, October 31, 2008, 2:39 PM

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Well, I could check out other gyms but my problem is that I am in a contract with my current gym and I pay a lot of money for the membership so I cant really have another membership.
Another thing they did at my gym. We were there the other night and one of the personal trainers were making gay jokes REALLY loud with me and my partner standing right there...and it is VERY obvious that we are gay. My partner looks like a boy! :)
Anyway I am sure we could talk to the managment and get out of the contract after both things happend.

Friday, October 31, 2008, 3:42 PM

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Sounds like a crappy place to be! If it's causing you to not work out, you have gotta find another gym. BUT - I echo the comments of the previous poster - don't use this as an excuse not to work out. I would encourage you to try to stand up against it, and focus on yourself. If this can't work though, before you get out of the contract and/or leave, have a solid plan of action to reach your exercise goals. I also think a buddy system is a great tool, so I;m glad to hear your girlfriend goes with you. If you guys don't always go together, Craigslist ( has tons of community activity partners looking for people to pair us (in my area, at least). Maybe you need to look at other exercise options outside of the gym, too.

Good luck!!

Friday, October 31, 2008, 4:16 PM

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tina.. I will tell you what I tell myself.. the first few times I went to my gym there were some fit girs running on the treadmills. and some really hot guys.. they first looked at me like I didnt have a right to be there ( or so I thought) ... but wether they were thinking that or not.the first two times I walked out and went home and just did a few exercises in my room..

the next tme I went . the same cute guys and fit girls were there and I turned around to go and than I though what the hell am I doing.. this is my gym.. its in my complex. I pay rent here. I have as much right to behere as they do.. and I said hello and started working out.. the guys will even show me how to life a certain way or adjust a machine if I need it.. the women tell me enjoy your workout..

we have to make our own way.. this is for YOU.. who cares what others think.. soon you will be rocking that new bod and feeling healthy. thats what matters.. YOU mattter! do it for you!


Friday, October 31, 2008, 10:17 PM

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Make a commitment to yourself that you're going to work out for TEN MINUTES. After the ten minutes is up, you can go home. But most likely, once you start, you'll be fine and be able to do a full workout.

Saturday, November 01, 2008, 1:34 AM

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I'm with 1:34am

The ten-minute trick is a good one. And if you don't feel like doing anything more, at least you did SOMETHING for 10 minutes.

Saturday, November 01, 2008, 6:22 AM

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There are many people who are judgmental and heartless anywhere you go; telling crude jokes, mocking looks, and nasty remarks. But that says more about them than about you.

You have taken the first action in getting fit, deciding to do it. Now is the tough part, doing it. If only for 10 minutes put on some headphones and take one step in front of the other. You are strong and it is a daily decision to get up and do what's best for you.

I am a personal trainer and I have heard my share of offensive talk at the gym (don't know why that's such a hot spot for it) everyone is exposed there I guess. But I love it when I see people coming in to work out for themselves.

Saturday, November 01, 2008, 8:49 AM

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Hi Tina
I used to go to the gym but would be unmotivated for so many reasons. Now I workout at home with Beachbody 10-Minute Trainer and I am finally consistent and since August I've lost 13 lbs and 23 inches. Check out You can work out in privacy (which I prefer) and the 5 workouts are only 10 minutes each, so motivation's not too tough, I do 3 a day, but it's up to you. I highly recommend it!

Sunday, November 02, 2008, 5:37 PM

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I work at a gym and when I moved my office into it I weighed 250lbs. It was really a mind bending experience to come to work everyday and be around hard bodies.
Over the last few months I have managed to remove 30 very stubborn pounds. It is still a mind bending exercise to go to work some days. Just in the last few months I have moved from the pool into the actual gym. All of clients who want to be helpful all are tracking my progress and giving opions on what they see me eating.
One of the things I have had to look at is my lack of boundaries both personal, the inability to stop eating, to allowing others to comment on my progress.
I have in the last few weeks polity asked those people not to ask about my progress, telling them when I hit my goals I will share them. It has been a good exercise in taking my personal power. It would be so powerful for you to say to these laughing what not people the truth. That it hurts your feeling and working out is hard enough without the negative influence from them. It will take a lot of courage to do this, just keep in mind as we love ourselves more and take better care of our external space we will drop the weight and succeed in our goals. It is also important to get these people in check and not let them discriminate! So be strong! Put yourself first on the list. Speak up and speak out ! Changing our habits means changing our life.

Sunday, November 02, 2008, 5:57 PM

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If you get into your car, and get to the gym its more unlikley that you will turn around and not go. Although that does happen, its the first step to getting there!
Go to the gym and just do some wakling on the tredmill, at least your doing something! then work your way up.
About the people making remarks/looks. Bring a music playing device with headphones if you can. I find it blocks other people out and you can remain focused on yourself. Or look at a magazine while on the bike!

Sunday, November 02, 2008, 6:20 PM

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tina - no matter what the situation, gay-bashing is not acceptable under any terms. if you are comfortable reporting it, you have every right to let the management know that there is discrimination going on and that the gym is a threatening environment to be in. no one should be made to feel that way, whether it be due to sex, race, age, size, whatever!!

stay strong and good luck.

Monday, November 03, 2008, 2:50 AM

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Again, not to minimize your experience but now you've got a second excuse not to go. First it was the girls laughing at you and when all of the PP told you how to stand up to it, there's suddenly the gay bashing. In no way, shape or form do I condone any form of that and it's not cool. I will guarantee you that if you tell the manager you want out of your contract because the staff is unprofessional and homophobic, and that everyone in town as well as the local media would LOVE to hear about it, they will let you out of it. Word of mouth is huge in that business. But if you want to stay, then confront those people for the idiots they are and take a stand. Then push them aside and go work out. Bottom line: work out there or somewhere else, but work out.

Monday, November 03, 2008, 9:38 AM

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