Accusations of Eating Disorders and How to Handle It

Hey all. :)

When I lost my first thirty pounds (I'm 5'6", went from 155 to 125 in a few months), I was a senior at college. People had three different reactions to my weight loss:

1. No reaction
2. Supportive and complimentary
3. B*tchy

Number 3 came in two forms: One was girls claiming that I had changed since my weight loss, that I thought I was "all that." It made me sad, because in fact what had happened was that I had simply gone from shy and quiet to confident and happy. I think girls often don't like changes in the status quo.

The second way number 3 came into play was with accusations of an eating disorder. Now, there is a huge difference between being nosy/accusatory and being concerned. I carefully monitered my diet and exercise to ensure I was losing no more than 2 pounds a week. I was also honest with my friends: when they asked me if I knew I was losing weight, I told them that I was on a diet and was really excited about the weight loss. Still, the comments came: "I'm worried about you." "Don't you think you've lost enough?" "Are you taking care of yourself?" "Are you eating enough?"

It can be difficult to know how to handle these remarks. From close friends, they are a mark of concern and love. The best response in this situation is to be honest, I think: Tell them that you're on a diet, that you'd never do anything to endanger your health, and that you'd really love their support in this.

However, from casual acquaintances, this type of thing can be vexing -- especially if it's obvious that you're not an unhealthy weight. It's interesting to note that all of these comments came from other girls my age (between 20 and 23). I think the thing to keep in mind is that people are often put off by change, and nosy by nature. The best thing to do when people who don't know you well enough to make these comments make them, is to simply let them know that the comment is inappropriate in a polite way: "Thanks for your concern, but my health is a private matter. I would appreciate it if you respected my judgment."

Thu. Mar 2, 8:23am

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