What goes through your mind before a binge?

I always said to myself... what's one more time, diet starts tomorrow.. one more food fest can't hurt.... but the diet never seemed to start - or it would start and last 1 day.... the same scenario kept going through my mind every time for years...

I have been able to change this thinking... but I'm wondering what others have as an internal dialogue before they binge???

Tue. May 13, 7:29am

My problem is nothing goes through my head. I shut it off so I can eat. Nothing about health, nothing about how shitty its going to make me feel, nothing about how if i keep doing it ill feel worse and hate myself more. I just dont think. Maybe putting up reminders around the kitchen would help.

Thinking about it, my other problem is it feels like an act of rebellion. like "fuck all the skinny bitches, the motivational speakers, the richard simon's of the world, Im gonna eat a big mac damnit" and its so stupid - its not rebelling against anything except my body screaming "oh god please dont put that crap in me."

What do others think

Tuesday, May 13, 2008, 7:34 AM

I binge in response to anxiety. I know it is a physiological response -- I am having an anxiety attack, and carbs calm me down.

I've gotten to the point where I accept that I binge in this situation, and what goes through my mind is how to manage the binge so that I eat something basically healthy (broccoli? it's nice and crunchy!) instead of cookies, and fill up fast.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008, 8:38 AM

Before i USED to binge i would tell myself something like 'I am miserable cos i cant eat thething tha i want. I will have 1 last pig out and stat aain tomorrow'.

The thing is being in this stat of mind would happen often, sometimes day after day after day.

Nowadays if I feel it happening I realise if i dont have something I will binge so I share a chocolate bar with my son or a small burger with my other half. Or have 1 biscuit etc... I dont work well with complete deprivity. And raw brocoli would certainly not work for me.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008, 8:53 AM

"Well...since i wont be eating any of this stuff when i am on a diet i need to eat it all now and then start tomorrow."

I am kind of embarassed to admit that. How unfortunate is that??? I can't believe i think like that. Yes, i do still think like that. That is why i lost the weight and then gained half of it back. I am working on changing my mode of thinking in regards to the binging process. I hope it works.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008, 9:01 AM

I am not actually sure because there seems to be a level of unconsciousness before I start. My body and my mind are usually very tired. I usually have been doing "pretty good" so there is a certain amount of physical deprivation (need fat, need sugar) and psychological desire built up. I eat something that is off plan, usually healthy, wait a bit, think of something else, eat, wait, think of something else, eat, horrible stuffed feeling, can't eat anymore but eat some more, stomach hurts too bad like rocks inside stomach..go to bed. While I am in this process, I abandon all since of my own identity, what I do for a living, who I love, what is important doesn't exist. I don't have any psychological dramas or circumstances I am trying to escape at the time. I think it is just this overpowering need and want to feel satiated.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008, 9:13 AM

nothing goes through my mind, I just act on impulse

Tuesday, May 13, 2008, 10:07 AM

8:46, I nuke the broccoli for a minute or two. But yes it can also be eaten raw.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008, 10:36 AM

my mind goes numb. all i think about is the food. it is like there is a buzzing in my head.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008, 10:59 AM

that is such a good question...

I really agree with the "nothing" people - I don't rationalize or "think" anything - I guess I just have this strong subconsious desire for a very thick peanut butter and jelly sandwich and I just give in to the subconsious urge - I kinda shut off my brain which is easiest to do on Sunday, when I am already relaxed... (there is just a point at which I very subltly decide not to follow my diet, it is kindof like when you know you are tempted to do something wrong and you just try to empty the brain of thoughts to stop your screaming conscience - creepy!

I try to stop this by having a concrete food plan even for the whole weekend.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008, 11:19 AM

Yeah, I am in the nothing camp too. Or I have been in an emotional space and I don't want to be there anymore. But this is usually something I see after the fact not before I binge. It feels unconscious, blind and driven. I am shut down and want to stay there.

It unfortunately never "works." Maybe the first bites do the trick so I keep going but it fails to get me "there." After the fact I realize I don't know where "there" is....it's just not "here."

Frequently with a binge I am not sure what I want to eat either so I keep going until I feel like I might be "on to it."

I wonder if it is what being an alcohalic or drug addict feels like. I can't put it into "high" language...maybe just "turned off." Asleep, somewhere else, not feeling it anymore....or not missing not feeling it anymore.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008, 1:03 PM

OP

thanks so much for your input. and I have to say is that I can relate with every single answer... anxiety, boredom, nothing, just giving in to the implulse,, eating it all because i cant once I go on a diet, etc etc. I felt like a ddouble personlaity... the "good" girl and the "bad" fighting it out.. the good girl never won.. the bad girl was tougher..... plus when I was preparing for a binge - everyone out, totally isolating.. I was so anxious about it that I didnt want the phone to ring, or kids wake up.. or ANYTHING that would ruin the binge that I thought I totally enjoyed... and yes, it totally numbed me .. after I was done making several trips to the kitchen... i see myself in every single answer I've read.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008, 3:04 PM

I'm with the others who said...

that NOTHING runs through their minds. It's when I STOP thinking about what I'm doing that I head into a mindless eating binge ... now when I stop - WOAH, that's a though process I need to get a handle on :(

*sigh* - I'm on a first day back after a 3 day binge

Tuesday, May 13, 2008, 3:25 PM

Related Content: How To Lose Weight- The Basics Weight Watchers Points System The Fat Smash Diet The Eat To Live Diet The Beck Diet Solution How To Get The Motivation To Lose Weight		How To Be Successful Using PEERtrainer How To Burn Fat Online Weight Loss Support- How It Works Does Green Tea Help You Lose Weight? Tips On Using PEERtrainer Visit The PEERtrainer Community Diet and Fitness Resources
Fitness Weight Watchers Meetings Learning To Inspire Others: You Already Are Writing Down Your Daily Workouts Spending Money On A Personal Trainer? How I Became A Marathon Runner		Preventive Health How To Prevent Injuries During Your Workout Flu Season: Should You Take The Flu Shot? Are You Really Ready To Start PEERtrainer? Super Foods That Can Boost Your Energy Reversing Disease Through Nutrition
New Diet and Fitness Articles: Weight Watchers Points Plus How To Adjust Your Body To Exercise New: Weight Watchers Momentum Program New: PEERtrainer Blog Archive Review Of The New Weight Watchers Momentum Program		Weight Loss Motivation by Joshua Wayne: Why Simple Goal Setting Is Not Enough How To Delay Short Term Gratification How To Stay Motivated How To Exercise With A Busy Schedule
Real World Nutrition and Fitness Questions Can Weight Lifting Help You Lose Weight? Are Protein Drinks Safe? Nutrition As Medicine?		Everyday Weight Loss Tips How To Eat Healthy At A Party How To Eat Out And Still Lose Weight The Three Bite Rule Tips On How To Stop A Binge