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Do i need to lose weight or do I ?eed to realise I have a problem.

IIm 26 and a mother of a five year old. I am 5'4'' and weigh 132 lbs. Everyone tells me I have a fantastic figure and I seem to get attention wherever I go yet I still feel fat.

I was married to a horrible man who used to call me fat all he time even though after I left him he told me he never really thought that. I think it has stayed with me though.

I want to get down to 125lbs but everyone tells me i would look to skinny. Arethey telling the truth or are they just being nice.

I sound so self obsessed but I just want to be happy with myself. Has anyone any advice?

Sat. May 3, 1:47pm

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I am 5'4", heavy-boned, and weigh 120-ish.... seems about right to me. But "too skinny" certainly varies with the person. Seems as if you are in the healthy range where you are, and would be healthy 10 lbs lighter as well.

Saturday, May 03, 2008, 2:02 PM

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You say you want to be happy with yourself. So you're admitting you're not happy.

You think that if you were 125, you'd be happy.

Most people here are in the same boat. However, I really think that more people shouldn't base their happiness on their own perception of they're body. You're clearly at a healthy weight. So examine why you are so unhappy with your body. Most of those women who say you have a fantastic body would probably love to have it. But you're not happy. Working on your head may be of more benefit than working on your body.

Saturday, May 03, 2008, 2:13 PM

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I do need to sort my head out, so to speak. I am at a healthy weight . A lot of my body issues are to do wh my height. Being small means my legs are short which most people think is cute but I think I carry weight here more due to it. I exercise a lot and eat well so I am going to try to stop trying to be something Im not. I dont think im ever going to be ecstatic about my body but as long as my boyfriend thinks im gorgeous I should at least try to be happy.
Im trying to talk myself into it but then Ill have a bad day and will be back to square 1. I went to the doctors about this and she told me to stop being silly and be happy that I have a nice figure. I dont think this was very professional myself as I wasasking for help, not to lose weight but to accept myself.

Saturday, May 03, 2008, 2:27 PM

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I don't know about body size only you know what you look like and if you would feel better a few pounds smaller.
But it certainly sounds like you have to address the body image issue.
After you have spent time with someone tearing you down about your weight it seems to become a part of you.
It can be so hard to fight.
That is where I would focus my attention.
Best wishes.

Saturday, May 03, 2008, 2:53 PM

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Focus on eating your veggies and fruits cutting down on sugar and fried foods (if you eat these) and staying active with your child, and getting your exersize.

The rest will fall into place.

Sadly, I think its common for woman in her 20s to have body image issues. I know I did.

Try hard to overcome these issues, I know its not easy.

Good Luck!

Saturday, May 03, 2008, 3:20 PM

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I feel the same way except i'm 5'9 and 130 lbs! My stomach still pisses me off to know end, and i've seriously come close to going without food because I just feel fat. I cannot stand it and I know how you feel.

Monday, May 05, 2008, 8:45 AM

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I'm 5'4" and my goal weight is 140 so that just goes to show how body types are different. I hear you with the short leg stuff, but losing weight won't necessarily change that. I was 105 in h.s. and my legs still looked big!

I can't tell you if you should lose weight or not, but it sounds to me like you need to be happy with just who you are first and get everyone else's perception of you out of your head. Once you are and you still think you should lose, then go ahead. At least you'll know it's coming from a healthy place.

I would talk to the person you trust most. I know my best friend would tell me the honest truth if I asked her for it. Most people probably do think you look fine, but I trust the word of the person I know won't b.s. me.

Monday, May 05, 2008, 9:19 AM

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