The Latest Diet - Unbelievable

Dog Food Diet….

The next time someone asks you a dumb question wouldn't you like to respond like this?.....
Yesterday I was buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for Athena, my wonder dog at Wal-Mart and was in the check out line. A woman behind me asked if I had a dog. What did she think I had, an >> elephant?
So since I'm retired, with little to do, on impulse, I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, and that I was starting the Purina Diet again. I probably shouldn't, I continued, because I'd ended up in the hospital last time. I awoke in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my >> orifices and IVs in both arms. However, I did lose 40 pounds on the diet, so I was giving it another go.
I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is you load your pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete and I needed to lose a few more pounds. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was, by now, enthralled with my story.)
Horrified, this woman asked if I ended up in intensive care because I'd been poisoned by the dog food. I told her no, it happened because I stepped off a curb to sniff an Irish Setter's ass and a car hit both of us.

I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard!
WAL-MART won't let me shop there anymore.

Tue. Feb 5, 5:39pm

Okay that was pretty damn funny. But I find it hard to believe that it really took place. Good imagination though.

Tuesday, February 5, 2008, 5:45 PM

OP Here

My friend sent it to me, and I just thought it was too funny not to share.

Tuesday, February 5, 2008, 5:49 PM

That was really funny! I actually laughted out loud. Thanks for the spot of humour. It made my evening!

Tuesday, February 5, 2008, 8:16 PM

OMG! I laughed so hard when I read this! I read it out loud to my husband and he laughed too. Too bad this was just in an e-mail. I was thinking, "I've got to find this hilarious woman and befriend her!"

"...stepped off a curb to sniff an Irish Setter's ass and the car hit both of us."

Amazing!

Tuesday, February 5, 2008, 9:44 PM

Laughing as I type this - cute!

I chuckle even more because I have a spouse who totally does stuff like that all the time with an incredibly straight face. It's always entertaining although sometimes I take pity on the 'victims' and make him come clean that he's just teasing. He keeps it all in good fun though - no mean-spirited ones.

Wednesday, February 6, 2008, 1:04 AM

very cute

Wednesday, February 6, 2008, 10:11 AM

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