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Is there anyone out there who feels like this...
Well I did it again. I binged at lunch. I cant seem to get out of that mindset. Somewhere in me is a little voice saying, "you will start again tomorrow". I hate that voice. I am doing terrible things to my body by eating this way and I can't seem to find that strong part of myself anymore. The part that will have no part in eating until I feel sick and bloated. I have to break out of this cycle. I really don't know how. I have been trying for so long.
I have heard that there is a little good and a little bad in all of us and the one who gets stronger and thrives is the one you feed the most. That little bad or little good thing is different for everyone. What you feed it is different. For some its drugs or alcohol. For me its food. I think I have been feeding the bad part for so long that the good part cant find its way out anymore. I don't seem to have any control over my thoughts or will. The bad part is the one saying, "you can restart tomorrow". The good part is cowering in the corner somewhere inside me. I have to find it to save my very life and have a good quality of life. Why do I let food rule me?
Thu. Nov 4, 4:02pm
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