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Roberta's Reflections: Musings of a Psychotherapist
A PEERtrainer Series on The Psychology of Weight Loss and Health
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By Roberta Temes, PhD
I'm not the massage type. I've gone all these years never yielding to the lure of a massage because it truly never tempted me. But, in my pocketbook is a gift certificate for Manuelitas Soft Touch. If I don't use it I'll insult my friend Rita, who meant well. If I do use it I will probably perish. What to do?
I show up and find out that Manuelita is the name of the place; Joe is the name of the masseuse or is it masseur? This is not what I signed up for.
Joe senses my anxiety. He suggests I calm down. I suggest I come back another day. He's perceptive and asks, This couldn't possibly be your first time, could it?
I admit I'm new to this. Joe says, Nothing to worry about. I specialize in massage virgins. Just take your clothes off and we'll begin.
I want to tell him I just remembered I had a prior appointment; I have to leave immediately. A plane is waiting for me. A cab is waiting for me. I'll take a UFO. Just get me out of here, please.
No such luck. He hands me a sheet and walks out of the room. This reminds me of going for a mammography. I take off my sneakers and socks. I also remove my watch and my earrings. I cannot take off my jeans and sweater. I'm trying to cooperate, I really am, but they just don't come off.
Joe asks, through the door, How are we doing?
"I don't know about you, but I'm not doing so good. I think I might be coming down with something. I dont feel great. You probably don't want to get too close to me."
Joe's response surprises me. "Put your clothes back on and come out here when you're fully dressed. We'll talk some."
What do you mean? Aren't we doing this? Don't we have to go through with it?
No, says Joe. Massage is not a punishment, you know, and it's not for everyone.
I'm intrigued and quickly dress and go out to talk to Joe. He is a middle-aged man with a kind face and enormous hands. Knuckles are bulging out of each finger. He asks me a series of questions:
-Do you feel tension in your back?
-Do you get headaches?
-Do you have tight hamstring muscles?
-Do your shoulders give you a problem?
-Are there movements you want to make, but your body wont cooperate?
I answer truthfully. No, no, no, no, and no.
Joe explains that some people are born with good flexibility and dont benefit much from massage unless they have an injury or are particularly stressed. I state that I have no injury, I'm rarely stressed, and I dont like being touched by anyone not related to me. He then asks me a sensible question: Why did you come here?
We agree that I should leave. Am I the only person who's ever flunked massage?
Roberta Temes Article Archive:
Click Here To Read How Roberta Can Help You Eliminate the Psychological Barriers
Keeping You from Following Your Diet. Her program comes with an iron-clad 1 YEAR no questions asked money back guarantee and it's easy to order. If you like Roberta's writing style, you'll probably like her approach to helping you lose weight!
About the Author
Roberta Temes, (pronounced Temmis), Ph.D. is Clinical Assistant Professor,
Department of Psychiatry, at Downstate Medical School, New York City.
She had a private practice in New York City in psychotherapy, coaching, and
medical hypnosis for 30 years, and has now relocated that practice to Westfield, NJ.
Temes is the author of many self-help books and psychology books, as well as
the first medical school textbook about hypnosis. She is also the author of
the best-selling book, The Complete Idiot's Guide to Hypnosis. Her latest
book is called, The Tapping Cure.
Dr. Temes lectures around the country at corporate meetings, at medical
conferences, and at health spas, too. She did a stint as a columnist for a
country newspaper where she wrote about acquiring a country house and the
trauma of adjusting to fresh air, quiet, and nature. For
twenty years Temes wrote a monthly column for True Story magazine.
Dr. Roberta, as her clients call her, is now in practice in NJ where she
lives with her husband. Her 3 children are grown, with families of their own.
"The research is mounting: hypnosis can help you lose weight and keep it off longer . . . This set Enjoying Weight Loss has a lot to offer: a warm, fun hypnotist offering sound dietary advice and a variety of trances for a range of issues, from choosing a food plan to avoiding temptation."
-Jean Fain, Harvard Medical School
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